05-06-2006, 10:56 PM
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The Christ-Like Husband
Written form here: Or click on this link for Windows Media Player version and select April 9th, 2006.
Be Blessed:
Quote:
The Christ-Like Husband
Preached on Sunday, April 09, 2006,
Speaker: Pastor Ghandi Olaoye
“Husbands, love your wives” is a commandment. Husbands have to purpose to love their wives whether the wives are doing well or not. Women are wired to receive love; they flourish by getting the love from men...
Text: Ephesians 5:23-25
For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church, his body, of which he is the Savior. Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit to their husbands in everything. Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her to make her holy, cleansing her by the washing with water through the word, and to present her to himself as a radiant church, without stain or wrinkle or any other blemish, but holy and blameless (Ephesians 5:23-27).
God created us male and female establishing the difference between a husband (man) and a wife (woman). Husbands are to love their wives the way Christ loved the church and wives are to respect their husbands. You cannot love your wife the way you love your car, or the way you love to drink Coca-Cola. The love being expressed in this passage of the scripture is the agape love and is different from societal love.
Sanctification is a process, it does not happen in a day. As a husband, don’t hold on to your wife’s past because you will not sanctify her in doing so. To sanctify your wife, don’t keep reminding her of the past.
How did Christ love the church?
God’s kind of love involves giving up yourself for the benefit of the other even at your own expense. The Biblical love is an act of will not of a feeling. “Husbands, love your wives” is a commandment. Husbands have to purpose and to love their wives whether the wives are doing well or not. The love has to do with the need of the person being loved not the feeling of the person doing the loving. Jesus died for us before we needed salvation. Though he nearly gave it up at Gethsemane, he died for us because we needed his death.
Women are wired to receive love; they flourish by getting the love from men. A wife can only blossom through the love of her husband. We decided to love God because He died for us.
In Romans 5:8, Christ commanded his love (an act of will) toward us. Whether your wife is going to respond to your love or not, you have to love her as a husband. God commands man to show love because He knows it’s a difficult thing for man to do. Christ died for the church as her Savior. God expects every husband to be a savior of the wife. Jesus was the church’s savior by sacrificing for the church.
Sacrifice
Christ loved the church by giving Himself up for her and dying on the cross. Jesus, as a savior, wore a crown of thorns and carried a cross on the way to sacrifice. There is a crown of thorns a husband will have to wear. The rejection of the crown will always be a problematic marriage. The wife you are married to is ‘somewhat’ a cross to you. You have to know that it’s important for the marriage to work by carrying the cross and wearing the crown. As a husband, you must be willing to sacrifice your opinions, desires and preferences for your wife. Sacrificing is nailing your desires to the cross. Men are sometimes selfish to give up their desires for their wives.
If your wife has to think twice before confirming that you have made sacrifices (as a husband), you are failing.
A husband should let his wife know that she is precious in his eyes and that he is ready to set aside anything to make her happy. Husbands, have you stopped representing Jesus in your house?
Jesus was crucified and was seen by everybody. Sacrifices are always visible. Your wife should be able to see your sacrifices. Christ’s love was always there for us even at the time we disdained Him. Sacrifices involve what is best for the other person, not necessarily what is best for you. Sacrifice involves not having your way all the time because you are the head of the home. If everything is for you, it’s no sacrifice. Jesus gave up heaven to save us not because He had to but because He chose to. Husbands must chose to love by choice not feelings. You should sacrifice and show your wife love and never expect anything in return.
Loving is not grinding your teeth and complaining. If you keep complaining about your wife, you are not really sacrificing. It should bring joy and delight to sacrifice for your wife because she is the person you have promised at the altar of marriage. Many marriages are hurting because there is no sacrifice involved. Marriage is filled with expectations and when expectations are not met (betrayed), there is going to be a walk away.
Suffering
When you sacrifice, suffering is inevitable. You cannot give up something that is important to you and not suffer. To love your wife as Christ loves the church may hurt because she may not respond immediately the way you expect her to respond. A husband must persevere through the times the wife is skeptic and hostile. Christ perseveres through the times we are hostile toward Him. Christ’s faithfulness is new every morning and His faithfulness could be counted upon, this is why the church is singing the praise of Jesus. A husband should not expect his wife to sing his praise if his mercies are not renewable and his faithfulness not trustworthy.
Christ died for us not knowing whether we were going to respond.
If a marriage is not working, the problem is the head (the man), if a company is not working, they remove the head; if a church is not working they remove the pastor.
The husband should continue to love whether the wife appreciates or deserve the sacrifice. We also rejected Christ but he persevered until He won us. “ Husbands love your wives as Christ loved the Church” is a command.
Jesus did not have to stay on the cross but His love nailed Him there. Men love to make deals but you cannot put conditions on love if you want it to work. When you love your wife, you must believe that God can change her.
Substitution
A husband should not always have to have the last word because God has called him to substitute for his wife. Men always want to be right and love to show other people that they are right. Men sometimes will rather lie to show that they are right. Christ paid the price He didn’t owe. There is something inside a man that does not want to fail, and so men hide their feelings. When Jesus was hungry and angry, people knew. Don’t hide your feelings as a man; let your wife know what you are going through. God has commanded husbands to love their wives even when they don’t deserve it and especially when they deserve it.
Prayers
Husbands: God, help me to have your nature.
Wives: God, let my husband be formed in the image of Christ.
A lady who is yet to marry: God give me a Christ-like husband.
A man who is yet to marry: God, let me be formed in the image of Christ. Give me the grace to be able to please you in a marriage.
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