with everything she has gone through in the last two years since her husband, Jaiye passed on, Nollywood leading lady Stella Aboderin definitely doesn’t look the worse for wear, although now and then there’s a palpable dark cloud around her to suggest that her healing is still a work in progress. But then for this multi-talented 28 year-old actress, singer, designer; the future is definitely bright especially as ‘Gig Factor’, her band which transformed from ‘Synergy’ seem poised to be the next big thing in entertainment, even as she and her other Nollywood colleagues who were placed under a ban return. Looks like Stella is getting her groove back then? As Stella herself noted, “You don’t drown by falling inside water, you only drown if you stay there.” And drowning is not one of her options. It’s a new day and this Nollywood babe is gearing up for an even more stellar performance.

We finally track you down; so why was it so difficult to get you to do this interview? There’s really nothing to it, just that I’ve had so many things on my mind lately. Several of the interviews of me that you might have seen in other publications in recent times, were interviews I granted a long time ago. Genevieve has actually been one of my favourite magazines, and one of the earliests to request for an interview after Jaiye’s death. It just took some time, that’s all.


I guess you could also say that the press doesn’t exactly make it easy…but you seem to have managed well.
I simply decided not to bother myself with unnecessary side-talks and assumptions especially from those who do not even take the time to cross check their information before publishing. Incidentally, my late husband taught me to handle negative publicity. He used to say there’s no such thing as negative publicity in show business, publicity is publicity. He believed that it is only in this part of the world that we see some publicity as a bad thing. In developed countries, the more press attention you get, the more marketable you become. But then it is only human that those kinds of things occasionally hurt us and I have since realized that no matter what you do, there will always be people who would love you and those who would not. For me the most important thing is how such publicity affects those who are very important to me. As long as they know exactly what I’m about and what I’m doing, I’m really not worried. You could say I’m used to it now and that with all I’ve been through, I doubt if there is anything anyone can do to me that can be worse.


It’s been two years since Jaiye died and so much water has passed under the bridge; what are some of your regrets, pains and challenges?
The death of Jaiye has really made me realise that in this world, it is every man for himself. And that is unfortunate for us, because as humans we tend to depend so much on others to the extent that we gradually make them our ‘be it all’ and ‘end it all.’ But believe me, if you have a man like Jaiye you would definitely make him your ‘be it all’ and ‘end it all’, because he was one man who seemed to have all the answers. Talk about solutions, love, support, care and big shoulders to lean and cry on...that was Jaiye. Now, try to imagine what it would be like to suddenly wake up one day and not find all of that. You come to the painful realization that you have been yanked off your comfort zone and you are now so vulnerable. Given another opportunity, I will marry Jaiye again and again. As for regrets, I have none whatsoever. The best time, in my life so far are the ones I spent with him. And my only regret remains the fact that I went for a meeting on that fateful day. I have never been able to stop thinking that I may have been able to stop him from going out on that day, and maybe prevented the unfortunate incident of the day. Trying to live a normal life without him is nearly impossible. People see me looking nice on the outside, performing and socializing, and they think ‘oh all is well, she is grooving’ but you can’t really blame them, because that’s what I make them see. And that’s because I hate self-pity, and I won’t be happy having people do stuff for me saying "na because she be widow, if not…" Nobody knows what goes on when my children ask questions about their dad, demanding to see his pictures and hear his voice. Nobody knows what it is like to come back home to an empty bed with no one to share the events of the day with. You soon start to talk to yourself believing that God will hear and comfort you somehow. But you know as a human being you will long for your man to be by your side telling you not to worry. Nevertheless all this have strengthened my relationship with God.