Drogba's wife is called Lalla Diakite. I happened to intercept her call with the help of a few friends in high places. So here goes:

Diakite: Hey darling, how's your tournament so far?

Drogba: Not bad, I've just scored my first goal if the tournament.

Diakite: That's my baby. Now about this Mali game.

Drogba: What about it???

Diakite: Come on honey! You know what I'm talking about.

Drogba: But the whole world's watching.

Diakite: So are the Malians. Listen honey, I'm from Mali and I'm sure you're aware that the entire Mali is expecting a favour from us. Think about it! Your kids are also half Malian and I wouldn't want to be responsible for marrying the man that delibrately ruined the chances of millions of Malians, even though the game was of no importance to him. You better get your act together. I even got a call from the Malian president.

Drogba: Oh yeah? Haven't seen in him since 2006.

Diakite: Yes!! He called in relation to this issue and he expects a daughter of Mali to come to the aid of her people. You know a draw won't hurt anyone, so why not just do the right thing.

Drogba: The right thing will be to play a fair game.

Diakite: And kiss your wife goodbye. You better get your act together.

Drogba: Sorry darling, was just kidding. I'll see what I can do.

Diakite: That's my baby. You know you've never regreted marrying a Malian and I can assure you you won't regret it.

Drogba: Alright baby. Got to go now. We're having a team meeting 4 hours before the game. Tell his excellency not to worry. I'll see what I can do. Love you darling.

Diakite: Love you too baby. Wish you all the best, if you know what I mean.

Drogba: I do baby. I won't let you down. Bye.

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"The absence of evidence is not the evidence of absence."

"A river does not run through a forest without bringing down trees".