Wole Soyinka died and went to heaven ... As he stood in front of St. Peter at the Pearly Gates, he saw a huge wall of clocks behind him. He asked, "What are all those clocks?" St Peter answered, "Those are Lie-Clocks. Everyone on Earth has a Lie-Clock. Every time you lie, the hands on your clock will move." "Oh," said Soyinka, "whose clock is that?" "That's Rev. Hezekaiah's. The hands have never moved, indicating that he never told a lie." "Incredible," said Soyinka. "And whose is that one?" St Peter responded, "That's Nnamdi Azikwe's clock. The hands have moved twice, telling us that Zik told only two lies in his entire life." "Where's Obasanjo's clock?" asked Soyinka. "Obasanjo's clock is in Jesus' office. He's using it as a ceiling fan."