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Would U consider being a second wife?

Discussion in 'LOVE, MARRIAGE, THE SEXES' started by paj, Oct 20, 2011.

  1. paj

    paj D JENGBORAN OF YORUBALAND

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    ..ok..so dem no'o gree am for Yanki..but let's sey U dey Naija..U meet the nicest guy...he's real good to U,loaded,hansome and wear shoesize 22 like me..smokin: but he's married...ok..he let U sabi dat one upfront and there's an addendum:He's not leaving his wife..:devil but...you're welcome to consider the option of being wife #2...wetin U go say?:)
     
  2. Abike

    Abike Well-Known Member

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  3. bluestocking

    bluestocking Well-Known Member

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    God forbid! When dem no swear for me.
     
  4. NTB

    NTB Well-Known Member

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    No thanks
     
  5. babydoll

    babydoll Member

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    Hell to the Naw! (In my Madea voice).
     
  6. Tunde

    Tunde 10QLORD

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    If that is the case, would you mind being the girl friend on the side? That question goes for Abike, NTB, and babydoll as well.
     
  7. barbarellanoir

    barbarellanoir Well-Known Member

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    Only if he would consider being a second husband.
     
  8. Tunde

    Tunde 10QLORD

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    What is a "second husband"?
     
  9. blackbutterfly

    blackbutterfly Well-Known Member

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    :lol :lol :lol PROPER ANSWER! Thank you, my dear!
     
  10. ssergit

    ssergit ..still The Drama Queen!

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    SIMILAR THREAD: http://www.naijarules.com/vb/love-family-singles-marriage-sexes/12120-would-you-second-wife.html

    But...this seems to be the question most young successful men are asking these days. Even highly educated ones! Did Naija men have a meeting about this question???

    Seriously, why can't women have 2 husbands too? haba! Soooo NOT fair!

    2nd wife? It can be a very heartbreaking situation! But, even bible sef frowns at polygamy......but....What if Christianity is not against it?


    Personally, I believe Christianity makes a lot of people not to do so. Sure, Polygamy is horrible, but it also has worked for some.

    What is the difference between some women who remain first and only wives in loveless, miserable marriages? Wouldn't they live a better life if they married as a second wife to the 'Right' man?

    Why do women say they can't be a second wife, but they are sleeping with a married man. Which I think is even more demeaning, because they are eating the left over/crumbs of the wife!

    Look at it from this angle, MOST PEOPLE ARE MARRIED TO MR AND MS WRONGS! For a myriad of reasons! Some women married some men because of 'Biological clocks', some others married men for money. Some men married some women for their bodies, physiques, facial beauty, etc. Most people married due to lack of patience in waiting for the RIGHT man/woman.

    So, what if, say 10 years after their doomed marriage, they finally meet their soul mate? What happens?

    I guess it boils down to the issue of attaining happiness. How far would you go to achieve your personal happiness? Would it go as far as a polygamous setting? #FoodforThought!

    And if you say NO to second wife status: WHY do you say so? Religious reason(s)? Or simply because you don't want to have that 'second' status attached to you? {does it remind you of 2nd-hand?sweat:}

    Why do you say NO? I am seriously interested in your answers O, ladies, because I was just chatting with a friend today! She is in love with this guy, and he wants her to be his second wife. She said NO. But she can't stop thinking of the guy and calling him, but the dude dey vex and no wan talk to her! I am at a loss of what to say to her, except that 'Christianity frowns at polygamy'. But that they make each other happy is NOT in doubt!
     
  11. barbarellanoir

    barbarellanoir Well-Known Member

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    What is a "second wife"?...If you can answer that, then you can answer the question.
     
    Village-Boi likes this.
  12. Tunde

    Tunde 10QLORD

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    Excuse my ignorance. I have not only heard about but I have seen people with two wives before but "second husband" get as e be. I still don't get it. If you mind to explain, I will really appreciate it.
     
  13. Abike

    Abike Well-Known Member

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    Your head dey house? :p

     
  14. barbarellanoir

    barbarellanoir Well-Known Member

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    I'm saying that if a man wants me to accept a polygamous relationship, where I'm supposed to accept the fact that he is already intimately, and emotionally attached to another, then he should also accept the fact that I can become intimately and emotionally attached to another man as well....the same way I should "consider it", he should do the same. Do not expect of me, what you would never consider for yourself...simple as that.

    Here's an example by the way. sweat:
    I have two husbands: A polygamist
     
  15. babydoll

    babydoll Member

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    You mean being the girlfriend on the side, when I know he's married?
     
  16. babydoll

    babydoll Member

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    LOL, mad funny!
     
  17. mealone

    mealone Well-Known Member

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    Funny enough, the bible doesn't really frown at it( i stand corrected by bible scholars on here, but i have not read it anywhere in the bible). it only gave that order to those aspiring to be bishops, it says and i paraphrase "those who are bishops should be husbands of just one wife".
     
  18. Tunde

    Tunde 10QLORD

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    The bible doesn't frown on it IMHO but then I am not a bible scholar so I wouldn't know much but I haven't found it anywhere where it was frown upon in the bible.
     
  19. Tunde

    Tunde 10QLORD

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    Abi? If you talk say you don't want to be a second wife will you at least settle for being the girl friend on the side...:spiny:
     
  20. ssergit

    ssergit ..still The Drama Queen!

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    Really? I honestly do NOT know that, just that I hear pastors ALL THE TIME saying it is wrong. And I grew up in the Catholic church and I know that was totally frowned upon so much so that if a man even divorced his wife, he would not be allowed to have another church wedding (right?)...

    Oh boy! All these church and polygamy thing sha. Hmmmmm...So, i guess most women say no to polygamy because they dont want to be seen as 'settling into second-position'?


    Ok, WHAT IF the man asking for polygamy is a MULTI-BILLIONAIRE (US Dollars O, NOT Naira).....would all the babes here saying 'NO, heck no' etc still say NO to being a second wife? I mean, seriously????!!! Ladies! get real!

    Let me paint this scenario!
    Here goes:
    Mr B is a billionaire ($), and asks you to marry him! And straight up wedding present is: An island for you, a private jet you can use to have lunch in the Bahamas and breakfast in abuja. Your own mansions at least in 4 continents! Servants at your bidding!
    You don't get to shop, the best of the best designers come to your palatial boudoir to fit you with custom-made exclusive outfits!
    And yes, Mr. B accepts that you don't have to just sit and prim yourself at home, you can set up any business, any charity of your choice, just name it, it is done!
    And your saying yes and being called wife #2 or even #3 sef go open doors to all these goodies! A good cherry on the ice cream: Mr. B honestly does love you! he is romantic too. Sends you flowers and chocolates[if you like 'em], he sends you old skull hand written love poems [if you are mushy], he could just fly in and whisk you off to Paris for a sweet romantic dinner. Ooh lala! And yes! he showers you with exquisite jeweleries! You loose count of your diamond sets! {no swarovski)!

    Niggaz bitchez, pluuuuuze! Tell me say una go open mouth and say 'Heck No!" abeggiiiiiiii!!!!!! na this NR we no go hear word for una each time una get a new porsche or lamborghini!

    Not to talk of the people [extended families included and childhood friends] who are not doing well that you would give monies to and change their lives! And all the chieftancy titles your village go bestow on you!!

    Seriously, with Mr. B on his knees with a $5,000,000.00 engagement ring ensconced in a soft velvet box, would you say NO?
    And this is not you being materialistic O!, This is you meeting the elusive Prince charming! Who loves you silly and has lots and lots of money to make all your childhood fairytale love romantic dreams come true! I guess the thread's question should have been: "Would you consider marrying the man of your dream, even if it means becoming a second wife?"
     

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