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When it comes to our hair, We're our own worst enemy...

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noone

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kaymax said:
I really think that it depends on the environment and the industry. Some industries are more accepting than others. For example, your more traditional industries like banking, it is harder to pull off non 'mainstream' appearance, whereas in the tech industry, it's more acceptable. Additionally, it also depends on the position one holds and how high in demand it is, for example, I see more specialized physicians sporting their dreads and naturals because anesthesiologist, cardiothorasic surgeons are hard to come by. If one is in a high visibility position, EVP, Sr. EVP, etc, it's harder to sport your natural, you gotta be the best in that field or be in a more permissive field. Sales positions almost definitely keeps you from sporting 'ethinic' looks, unless of course, that's what you're selling. If one is in sales, you're selling your company first, then the product or the services, so you always have to dress 'acceptable' as you can walk into any business and it's always best to play it safe.

All in all though, I think it's changing, more women are starting to embrace their naturalness so to speak, each person having their personal reasons for doing so, hence, I think the change is emminent, though it will be gradual.

But I've heard that racism is more prevalent in the UK than here.
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In the UK, there are a lot more naturals, TV presenters with locs etc. They are a lot more accepting. I've been natural for almost ten years now and loc'd for almost three and it's never an issue. In fact the people that have issues with it are my fellow naija women...they will definitely turn you into a 'Natural Nazi' if you're not careful...the way they treat you because you're hair is not 'done'. The dirty looks they give when you go into a salon to 'do' your hair; the adding on of an extra £20-30 to have your hair in braids because 'your hair is too 'tik' '

There's a saying in Igbo - onye mee onwe ya nkilinka akwa, ewelu gi ficha ani - 'if you make yourself a rag, dem go use you clean ground.

Sure, there will always be people asking you 'when you're going to 'do' your hair'? 'Are you going to 'relaz' it?' but I usually reply gracefully, 'My hair is done' and it pretty much shuts them up (Incidentally, they are always Nigerian) Oyibo people want my hair like no man's business...my daughter's afro even more. She had to stop taking it to school as she was late to her classes 'cuz everyone wanted to touch it (teachers included) as she walked along the corridor.

The racism in the UK is a lot more subtle but I don't live in the States so I couldn't tell you if it's more or just different.

Gabrielle is a star that will inspire a lot more young people of African descent to take on sports that are usually seen as 'traditionally white' and that's all the counts. If people want to have hemarrhoids for her hair...they are more than welcome.
 
kaymax

kaymax

Well-Known Member
tam-tam said:
In the UK, there are a lot more naturals, TV presenters with locs etc. They are a lot more accepting. I've been natural for almost ten years now and loc'd for almost three and it's never an issue. In fact the people that have issues with it are my fellow naija women...they will definitely turn you into a 'Natural Nazi' if you're not careful...the way they treat you because you're hair is not 'done'. The dirty looks they give when you go into a salon to 'do' your hair; the adding on of an extra £20-30 to have your hair in braids because 'your hair is too 'tik' '

There's a saying in Igbo - onye mee onwe ya nkilinka akwa, ewelu gi ficha ani - 'if you make yourself a rag, dem go use you clean ground.

Sure, there will always be people asking you 'when you're going to 'do' your hair'? 'Are you going to 'relaz' it?' but I usually reply gracefully, 'My hair is done' and it pretty much shuts them up (Incidentally, they are always Nigerian) Oyibo people want my hair like no man's business...my daughter's afro even more. She had to stop taking it to school as she was late to her classes 'cuz everyone wanted to touch it (teachers included) as she walked along the corridor.

The racism in the UK is a lot more subtle but I don't live in the States so I couldn't tell you if it's more or just different.

Gabrielle is a star that will inspire a lot more young people of African descent to take on sports that are usually seen as 'traditionally white' and that's all the counts. If people want to have hemarrhoids for her hair...they are more than welcome.
Click to expand...

Wow, unbelievable!!!
 
T

toammyb

Born to lead and follow
kaymax said:
I really think that it depends on the environment and the industry. Some industries are more accepting than others. For example, your more traditional industries like banking, it is harder to pull off non 'mainstream' appearance, whereas in the tech industry, it's more acceptable. Additionally, it also depends on the position one holds and how high in demand it is, for example, I see more specialized physicians sporting their dreads and naturals because anesthesiologist, cardiothorasic surgeons are hard to come by. If one is in a high visibility position, EVP, Sr. EVP, etc, it's harder to sport your natural, you gotta be the best in that field or be in a more permissive field. Sales positions almost definitely keeps you from sporting 'ethinic' looks, unless of course, that's what you're selling. If one is in sales, you're selling your company first, then the product or the services, so you always have to dress 'acceptable' as you can walk into any business and it's always best to play it safe.

All in all though, I think it's changing, more women are starting to embrace their naturalness so to speak, each person having their personal reasons for doing so, hence, I think the change is emminent, though it will be gradual.

But I've heard that racism is more prevalent in the UK than here.
Click to expand...

Tbh, Not so sure I agree with you on the environment part. I have worked in the banking industry for a bit and have never heard any negative comment regarding my hair. Whether it's in a weave or I'm rocking a fro. As for racism being prevalent in the UK, it totally does depend on where you are. If you work your natural looks nice, neat and presentable, it doesn't matter where u are on the ladder, That's from my own experience. Btw, BNY Mellon is an investment bank.
 
kaymax

kaymax

Well-Known Member
toammyb said:
Tbh, Not so sure I agree with you on the environment part. I have worked in the banking industry for a bit and have never heard any negative comment regarding my hair. Whether it's in a weave or I'm rocking a fro. As for racism being prevalent in the UK, it totally does depend on where you are. If you work your natural looks nice, neat and presentable, it doesn't matter where u are on the ladder, That's from my own experience. Btw, BNY Mellon is an investment bank.
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Oh I agree with you on the weaves and neat fros, but try sporting dreads, in most banking environment, you wouldn't see too much of that. Also Mellon is NY, up north, they're typically more accepting, it'll be harder to pull off at a BB&T heardquartedred in NC or Wachovia when it was headquartered in Charlotte, but then again, location may play a big part too. I can see more acceptance in your neck of the woods than here in the southern 'bible belt' states.
 
Thickmadam

Thickmadam

OHHHHHH YEAHHHHHHHH!!
well, it happened to me so believe it.
and Aust_Nne don corroborate.
it's very real o. two women i used to eat lunch with everyday will make disparaging remarks about my hair or natural hair in general. in my very presence.
i'm telling you, i was annoyed and shocked the day the woman, african-american said to me that her hair was not done and she looked like an african.
i am still waiting for her to tell me how african hair looks
my oga usually stops by my cube to see what i have done to my hair, she talk say she can't do much with her hair, it just hangs straight.

one of our trade team guys, had these absolutely beautiful short nice and well kept locks, only for me to see him about two months later, and he'd chopped them off. i was heart broken.
he eventually left our company and started his own thing, and growing his hair again.
he didn't say anything but i suspect someone had said soemthng or made some disparaging remarks

toammyb said:
I find this hard to believe...wow! America really does have racial issues, either that or I am a very naive british resident. I work my fro to work every so often (BNY Mellon) and get more compliments than I know what to do with from both races...so I'm wondering why them fish brains find that not good enough for the corporate workplace.
Click to expand...
 
kaymax

kaymax

Well-Known Member
Thickmadam said:
well, it happened to me so believe it.
and Aust_Nne don corroborate.
it's very real o. two women i used to eat lunch with everyday will make disparaging remarks about my hair or natural hair in general. in my very presence.
i'm telling you, i was annoyed and shocked the day the woman, african-american said to me that her hair was not done and she looked like an african.
i am still waiting for her to tell me how african hair looks
my oga usually stops by my cube to see what i have done to my hair, she talk say she can't do much with her hair, it just hangs straight.

one of our trade team guys, had these absolutely beautiful short nice and well kept locks, only for me to see him about two months later, and he'd chopped them off. i was heart broken.
he eventually left our company and started his own thing, and growing his hair again.
he didn't say anything but i suspect someone had said soemthng or made some disparaging remarks
Click to expand...


Someone else mentioned that her friend said her hair wasn't done and that she looked like an African. I can't remember who posted that, but I believe you. I just started doing the natural thing, so I don't come across a lot of AFAM women here in South Florida, least not in my circles, they're mostly Jamaicans, and they don't really say anything since they have so many variations within themselves.
 
Thickmadam

Thickmadam

OHHHHHH YEAHHHHHHHH!!
yeah it was me, and that thing pained me well well.

when i started the natural journey (what? three years ago?) i will admit i didn't know much so i would just wear a lot of afro and headband. now my hair is longer and i found a good hair dresser who is creative.

i mean check am na, that yeye wendy (or as Barbarellanoir dey call am, WENDELL) williams came on tv (or was it the TJMS) i forget which one now, to say that natural hair is not ok to wear to formal occassions.
*sigh*
this issue of hair is one for the ages.

just live and let live jo. if you want to relax yur hair, go for it, if i want to wear natural, allow me.



kaymax said:
Someone else mentioned that her friend said her hair wasn't done and that she looked like an African. I can't remember who posted that, but I believe you. I just started doing the natural thing, so I don't come across a lot of AFAM women here in South Florida, least not in my circles, they're mostly Jamaicans, and they don't really say anything since they have so many variations within themselves.
Click to expand...
 
kaymax

kaymax

Well-Known Member
Thickmadam said:
yeah it was me, and that thing pained me well well.

when i started the natural journey (what? three years ago?) i will admit i didn't know much so i would just wear a lot of afro and headband. now my hair is longer and i found a good hair dresser who is creative.

i mean check am na, that yeye wendy (or as Barbarellanoir dey call am, WENDELL) williams came on tv (or was it the TJMS) i forget which one now, to say that natural hair is not ok to wear to formal occassions.
*sigh*
this issue of hair is one for the ages.

just live and let live jo. if you want to relax yur hair, go for it, if i want to wear natural, allow me.
Click to expand...

I don't want to derail the thread but come O, was she ever a man? Na serious question O. I googled her a few times, but found nothing but why can't I just let it go?
 
Thickmadam

Thickmadam

OHHHHHH YEAHHHHHHHH!!
lmaooo
i didn't know who she was until a few months ago. but i've heard that a few times.
lmaoooo
abeg make una leave me o biko. i can't be laughing today like i have the past few weeks pls.
kaymax said:
I don't want to derail the thread but come O, was she ever a man? Na serious question O. I googled her a few times, but found nothing but why can't I just let it go?
Click to expand...
 
kaymax

kaymax

Well-Known Member
Thickmadam said:
lmaooo
i didn't know who she was until a few months ago. but i've heard that a few times.
lmaoooo
abeg make una leave me o biko. i can't be laughing today like i have the past few weeks pls.
Click to expand...


I remember in the late 90s and early 2000, there was speculation when she was at 97 in NY or some radio station. She's made a lot of enemies O. Never paid much attention to it until she was on TV and I was like, 'that's a dude!!!"
 
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